There are so many things I need to write about....
Tic Tac Toe:
Casey came up one night and asked if I wanted to play Tic Tac Toe. I of course did NOT! In my head I was screaming... NOOOOOOO. However, I said, "Sure, Tic!" Casey responded, "Tac" I finished it with, "Toe, I won!" He then said, "Tic" I responded with a very quick "Tac -Toe! I won." It kept going on amid giggles. We both fell onto the couch laughing. Sam kept asking, "What's so funny." We finally let her in on our game... she couldn't understand the stupidity at first then finally got it. We sat on the couch giggling and talking instead of getting the dishes done that night.
Snow Day after Snow Day!
We have had SO many snow days. The kids were out for hours each day even when the temperatures dipped into the negative teens with the windchill. I LOVE snow days. Adults that work get personal days... Kids & moms get snow days. Each morning Kasey would drop Jeanie & her kids off on his way to work then pick them up again on his way home. Good thing he has all wheel drive. Ryan figured out how to get that darn tractor up the hill in the snow & just in time. We had 4-5 foot drifts covering our drive. There was noway we were going anywhere until we dug ourselves out. A neighbor came down with his tractor & helped. Now we have a huge mountain in front of the house. I love watching the kids play outside. They have so much fun together. It's always a good day when I am outside working up a sweat. Shoveling is God's way of getting me out of my winter funks! Hard work & fresh air... just what the doctor ordered.
Samantha's trip to Ohio:
She had an absolute ball. With all the weather her trip was extended a few days. I think she must have been sleeping with her PJ's backwards & lots of spoons under her pillow! On her way home her flight was running late. We were a bit nervous she might miss her connection. However, everything went well & she made it home safe & sound. We may be moving the dates of the Adamson reunion & Samantha kept hoping it would interfere with camp so she would HAVE to go back to Ohio this summer again! No such luck...
Sunday mornings:
We are on the 1pm block. The kids work on their Faith in God, Duty to God & Personal Progress. We usually read together as a family & get things ready for dinner. It's nice to hear them all playing together. It's changed a lot in the past couple years. Everyone is growing up. There's very little I have to do get anyone ready anymore. During church I actually get to listen most of the time. No-one is poking or jabbing me in the ribs. There isn't any crying or whining... well, maybe an occasional whine. I think I may have survived those years of coming to church only so that my children where in the right place. I think I'm entering the season of listening and pondering!
Worth:
Everyone of my issues can be traced back to feelings of self-worth... the lack of! A friend sent a clip about vulnerability. One of the premises really hit me. Everyone deserves to be loved. I started thinking about that & it's the whole I am a child of God thing. My kids deserve to be loved. Not because they obey or are talented or work hard. They deserve to be loved just because they are. I watched Ryan struggling out in the snow with a 4-wheeler & started thinking, "ugh, now I'm going to have to go out & get him unstuck!" I caught myself & said, "He deserves to be loved, even when I can not for the life of me understand the way he thinks." Someone started yelling at me & I said to myself, "She deserves to be loved. Not because she is sweet and kind and never disobeys. She deserves to be loved while she is screaming, throwing a horrible fit." It's made me accept... a little bit anyway, that I deserve to be loved despite the fact that I am not a size 2 or can keep my temper completely under control or cook amazing meals. I don't deserve to be loved because I am good at budgeting or organized or my kids SEEM to sit quietly during church. Love shouldn't be based on anything. We all deserve to be loved just because. I would be a much better person if I could fully embrace this fact. I'm trying to live it with my kids & husband. It's not always easy when the house is falling down around me & kids are fighting and crying and screaming. But it is making those days a wee bit better. I'm choosing to love them just because & in doing so I think I might be learning to love myself a little bit better just the way I am... fluff & all!
Casey's frigid walk...
The other morning I told Casey he was a car rider. Sam was in Ohio. Well, snow & ice came so the schools let out early. I asked Ryan to call the school & tell Casey to ride the bus home. He did. However, the secretary took down the wrong message & sent a note to Casey that he was a car rider. Casey was a bit confused, knowing I had told him already he was a car rider. He waits outside. I am not there so he walks toward the church. He walks back to school. Back and forth he goes, for an hour. He remembers the Jenni's don't live too far from church. He walks to their house down their 1/4 mile slippery lane. He's fallen at least 5 times just getting to their lane. That morning he wasn't going to wear a coat. I tell him to at least take my fleece. The weather is going to be bad. What if the bus gets stuck or something. I shove my gloves in his bag. Your a Boy Scout... you are always suppose to be prepared. Well, we both were very grateful he took the coat & gloves. I didn't realize he hadn't come home until the other kids came running in. Just after that the phone rang... it was Casey telling us he had walked to the Jenni's. He had been out in the ice and cold for almost 2 hours. I'm sure I will hear about this story many many times in the years to come. It will most likely be one of Casey's children's favorites.
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