We had a ball tonight. Sam's cross country team TP-ed the Seniors houses. Another mom & I drove and placed good luck signs as the girls did their business. Then, Ryan brought the rest of our kids in and we had a bit of mischievous fun ourselves. Including an alarm going off and a huge dog chasing us down. I love nights like these. I think we need to do a lot more. It's been a while since I've felt this light heartedness. A few months back I was talking with Jeanie. That morning we had run & I was dying! My hip & foot were killing me. I wanted to quit. But, I kept telling myself "just keep going, just finish." As we talked later that morning I told her how I felt while running then compared it to my life. There seems to be constant hurt and pain, so many times its that same thought, "just keep going." The tears started to flow as I realized just how tired I really was. I'm not sure why life never seems to even out for us. It seems just as one trial is coming to a close another one starts right up. I'm not sure what it is that I am to learn at this very moment. As I re-read my patriarchal blessing I noticed the talents it listed... ones that are improved only by trial! I'm not too excited about words like long suffering, patient, compassionate, etc. During times like these I want to shut my doors, turn off the phone and disappear for a while. I'm not a social person to begin with. Most of my efforts come from feelings of duty. I need to figure out a better balance. I need a week at the beach, no phones, no disruptions, just the peaceful, constant, soothing rhythm of waves crashing on the shore and my children's laughter. I think we all could use a week there. Instead, I think we will plan a few family fun nights as well as a fun trip to St. Louis. Sam runs at districts Saturday. It may be her last meet. If it is we are celebrating the following Saturday morning by staying in bed and watching movies all morning! Our Saturdays have been inundated with soccer games and cross country meets. NO MAS! We need a few roller hockey games, some bonfires and a whole bunch of family bonding. I've been so focused on other issues I haven't made that a priority. I think we'll regroup & refocus our energy into our family for a while. I'm officially hanging a sign on my door that reads, "Goodbye world, I'll be back in a few months!" Now if I could just get the mailman to loose our address for a bit!
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