The Geddes home in 2011 experienced record tear fall. I don't think we've ever shed as many tears in one year as in 2011. But with the tears came understanding, love, support and family bonds. I treasure the bonds I feel with my siblings. We could be at each others throats but the minute someone did or said something against one of us they had to deal with all of us. I remember a time a couple older boys had my younger brother Jared's arm twisted behind his back. I told them to let him go. They didn't. I told them again & they said, "What are you gonna do about it?" As if they were going to be afraid of a girl, a younger girl at that! Little did they know I had one fast & furious upper cut. The poor boy didn't know what hit him and sucked air for quite sometime! I ran and hid. I was afraid of what my mom was going to do to me for making that boy cry. I treasure the feelings of love I have towards my family. The life we lived and experienced created those feelings and bonds. I can't recreate those times for my kids to encourage those feelings. 2011 took care of that in a small part. For the first time Sam and Ryan really connected. She has needed him this year. She has found comfort in having him close and available. I am grateful for the challenges she has faced that has given her the opportunity to build a lasting and much needed relationship with her Dad. Ryan was gone so much during her younger years she missed those opportunities Rebekah and Isabelle have had. The Lord has made up for it. She's learning to trust in her Heavenly Father. Her patriarchal blessing has been such a help. The Lord is able to say things that mom & dad can't. She's learning the atonement comforts and heals hurts from an unfair world. Home has become a safe haven for her. A place she feels loved, understood and supported. My self-esteem has always come from outside sources, that is slowly changing. Thankfully, hers is growing from knowing who she really is, a daughter of God. Sam has been able to empathize with her little sister as she is dealing with some hard things at school. Isabelle came home yesterday in a funk. She elbowed Rebekah and was sent to her room. Sternly, I asked her, "WHAT IS GOING ON!" She fell apart, sobbing. I should have known. It's been happening on a regular basis lately. Not very nice notes, looks, etc. This morning she started crying before I dropped her off at school. I'm at a loss. I'm not really sure what to do. I'm finding myself telling them to pray. Pray that you can forgive them. Pray that you can listen to the Holy Ghost. Let Him guide you through these trials. He is the only one that really knows what should be done. I'm still learning these lessons along with them. There are moments of anger then overwhelming sadness. These are the times when it doesn't matter what is right or wrong, I have to find away to forgive and move past it. It's very humbling to kneel and ask forgiveness for the harsh thoughts I've had towards another person, knowing that is the only way to have peace and happiness in my life. Humbling myself enough to not worry about what is right or wrong but to do what Christ did over and over. As I feel His healing power in my life I find myself seeing more than what the world sees in us. We sat and talked with a few sisters the other day. I love when He blesses me with a glimpse of what He sees in someone. We visited with amazing women. Women that have endured hard trials and continue to face each day with faith. I'm not a huge fan of my calling at church. Thankfully, the Lord doesn't take requests! He gives us that which will help us grow and develop talents that need working on. I will be forever thankful to a loving Heavenly Father that ignores my fits and temper tantrums then continues on with what is best for me... like it or not!
Comments