Choose your love, love your choice

A few Sundays back there was a discussion on testimonies and when we really felt we had one.  I made the comment it wasn't until I had to make a choice between the gospel and what I had considered my soul mate.  A woman asked me what a soul mate was.  After a quick google search, I read her the following definition...

A person with whom you have an immediate connection the moment you meet -- a connection so strong that you are drawn to them in a way you have never experienced before. As this connection develops over time, you experience a love so deep, strong and complex, that you begin to doubt that you have ever truly loved anyone prior. Your soul mate understands and connects with you in every way and on every level, which brings a sense of peace, calmness and happiness when you are around them. And when you are not around them, you are all that much more aware of the harshness of life, and how bonding with another person in this way is the most significant and satisfying thing you will experience in your lifetime. You are also all that much aware of the beauty in life, because you have been given a great gift and will always be thankful.

With all sincerity she asked why I would do that?  How could I give something like that up?  It made me think a bit... I would still say that person and I were an almost perfect match.  But the gospel would never be apart of his life, I didn't realize that for a really long time. Thankfully the Lord stepped in and a choice had to be made.  Which brings me to today...

This morning I was a bit frustrated with my sweet husband.  I didn't talk so sweetly to him.  I returned home as he walked in from a run.  I looked at the clock and realized he had to shower and leave for work.  I asked if he had eaten lunch and he replied, "No, I haven't eaten breakfast either.  I'm just going to grab a bowl of cereal."  I started making him lunch.  He came out dressed, ready to go.  We exchanged a few pleasantries, I could tell he was down.  I looked at him and reassured him how much I loved him.  It was then that I realized and explained...  I always love you.  No matter the situation, mess, stupid words, disagreements, etc. it does not change the love I feel for you.  I don't think he's really gotten that in the past.  But today, I think he started believing it.  I've said it a hundred times to him.  Years ago it was a conscious choice.  Much like choosing spinach... it's good for you, it brings great health benefits and it's green (I like green).  You realize the good and decide to choose it.  After a while you realize I LOVE spinach!  Stupid analogy yes... but today I realized, it wasn't a choice, I LOVE him, absolutely and unconditionally.  I guess my point is, love and marriage is always a choice.  Starting with he's cute, he makes my heart skip a beat, is fun to kiss, we like the same things... let's get hitched.  It doesn't stay a fairyland of hearts and candy.  Where's the growth in that?  Life gets hard and you want someone there to weather the storms with.  Someone that is going to look past weaknesses and focus on strengths.  Someone that grows with you.  Someone to lean on when you can't stand alone.  Someone to carry the load when another step seems impossible.  That is who Ryan is, my eternal mate.
With a few minor changes the definition of a soul mate becomes the definition for my eternal mate... A person with whom you have a connection.  You are drawn to them.  As this connection develops over time, you experience a love so deep, strong and complex, that you begin to doubt that you have ever truly loved anyone prior. Your eternal mate understands and connects with you in many ways and on many levels, which brings a sense of peace, calmness and happiness when you are around them. And when you are not around them, you are all that much more aware of the harshness of life, and how bonding with another person in this way is the most significant and satisfying thing you will experience in your lifetime. You are also all that much aware of the beauty in life, because you have been given a great gift and will always be thankful.